A new slice of homework I had involved more use of double entendres. I was to take a word appropriate to the occasion and put down as many sound-alikes that come to mind. Then write the joke. For example, “hormone” sounds like “whore moan”, “her moan” and “harmony”. So you could say “Hormone could be heard clear across campus” or “How do you make a hormone? Dont pay her.” Now it’s my turn to come up with 1-2 double entendre homonyms from the following words:
Cease her and bring her to my chamber tonight!
I see her in my dreams and masturbate to her in my reality.
I asked the hillbilly how much the PBR tallboy was and he responded “2 ders”.
I dont want to toot her horn, but the arrogant bitch does act better than Drew Barrymore.
At the end of the night when we were done, I paid her, kicked her ass out and wished her farewell.
If I ever run into the cops and they wanna perform a full body cavity search, I’ll let my buddy take the fall.
The only thing separating me and the kilo of yip from Canada was a toll.
Man, all that alphabet spelling with my tongue took a toll on me.
I don’t mind a boo-er, but a hipster who is too important to pay attention to a joke is too mainstream for me.
Rambunctious behavior may occur, but the Retirement home went ahead with double bingo night.
I’m gonna make her fall asleep…hard!